Spitting Out the Kool-Aid

I was unknowingly understating myself a few weeks ago when I said I was really looking forward to Joe Miller's deposition in the mayor's case. Little did I know.

Now then, boys and girls: after listening to Bill Grady scooping the rest of KC media with his Miller interview, let's summarize what we know:

1. The mayor and his staff violated campaign ethics laws. (Ignorance is not a defense.)

2. The mayor's wife did in fact serve as staff - she set the mayor's schedule and directly influenced policy.

3. The mayor deliberately ordered staff to violate the state's Sunshine Law.

4. The mayor, instead of devoting himself to his full-time job, has been quietly working on our dime to build up his outside consulting business.

5. Gloria needs Lexapro. Or Prozac. Or valium. Something.

I met Joe Miller briefly early on in the mayor's administration. Seemed like an earnest young man who had definitely drunk the Mayor's Kool-Aid. After listening to his interview with Bill Grady, it's obvious the Kool-Aid has soured.

Miller has obviously been greatly disillusioned, and no wonder. What an irony - a former zealous journalist who - a month or so into the so-called Orange Revolution finds himself violating a principle he once held dear: Sunshine and freedom of information.

His publicly-stated reason for resigning was incomplete - privately he was appalled by the violations of state law and the behavior of the mayor's wife. Now he's gone public in a big way. So perhaps we should add the word "integrity" to the earlier descriptor "earnest." (Or maybe this is a convoluted way to promote his next book? God, how DID I become so cynical?)

Note to Chris Koster, incoming attorney-general: surely there's something actionable in all this? A recall takes too much and takes too long - can't you do something on our behalf?

Please make it stop...

The saga of our co-mayors has, for a long while, been highly entertaining in a macabre sort of way.

Now it's just embarrassing.

Kansas Citians are 'beige.' We're 'reserved.' Gloria = "Hillary and Michelle." The co-mayors are under attack by the powers that be because of Funk's new 'vision' for the City. (And that vision would be....what?)

Could you both just SHUT UP???

And how DARE you put yourself in the same category as Senator Clinton and Michelle Obama. Both those women have class, something obviously missing in our 'first lady.' (gag)

Saturday Morning Funk

So I'm a glutton for punishment. It's a dank, cold, grey and windy morning - currently 32 degrees, for God's sake, with tiny ice pellets on the back porch. Winter is making its debut.

Up before dawn with nothing else to do, I've read the entire 196 pages of the deposition given by former Funkhouser Chief of Staff Ed Wolf in the "Mammygate" lawsuit.

Like I said - a glutton for punishment.

But I'm also fascinated by the goings-on at KCMO's City Hall. Having worked there a hundred years ago, I have been both entertained and appalled by the goings-on since the Funkhousers (deliberate plural) have taken office.

Some observations from my reading:

* Wolf seems only peripherally involved in the day-to-day workings of the office. Lot's of "I didn't know about that" kinds of responses. Even though he states he thought Gloria was a cause of tension in the office, he never spoke to the mayor about it. And, I repeat, he was the Chief of Staff. In title, anyway.

* More: In his deposition, he says he was "stunned" when the Bates allegations came out, that he "did not realize that this kind of communication or tension existed" in the office.

* Apparently, no one expressed their concerns about his wife to the mayor. Not until Joe Miller spoke truth to power and said it out loud: "that Gloria should not be at the office." Miller resigned shortly thereafter.

* Big Brother is alive and well at City Hall. Wolf asked for City phone records to see if Ruth Bates was calling Shawn Pierce. He got the records (which, of course, since it's a piece of City equipment, Wolf's entitled to do.) There were no such calls.

* From his description, the mayor's office sounds like a hellhole for employees. No wonder so many have left...or been driven to tears.

* And, from his description, the mayor is someone who's driven away his best friends and supporters.

What can we next expect? Well, there's the Wall Street Journal article on this whole mess. And, of course, still more depositions.

I'm most looking forward to Joe Miller's....

Weekend Rants

* Who in God's name can be undecided in this election? Who are those people? Have they not been paying attention????

There's a clear distinction between the policies, temperament, and attitudes of the two men at the top of the ticket. (I won't even discuss the two VP combatants - one is so woefully unqualified there's simply no question as to who's the better choice.)

Two more days and then it'll be over. At least, I HOPE it will be over. Lawyers are being mobilized everywhere to be on alert Tuesday and THAT is certainly worrisome. (Anybody remember 2000? Oh, what a difference that would have made.)

Please, God, give us a clear outcome on Tuesday night....


* So Funk is now telecommuting, doing his job from his house in order to diminish the separation time from his dearly beloved.

How nice for them both. I telecommute as well - when I can - and find I'm infinitely more productive when I don't have to deal with the phone calls and other interruptions - I don't have to waste time with the whole makeup-dress-for-success ritual, nor do I have to spend an hour in traffic getting to and from work. I have access to my work computer via the Web, so can keep on top of email and dive into any files I need from the job.

I get a helluva lot done working from home. And I enjoy it. I work in my pajamas, get dressed only to walk the dog, can throw dishes in the dishwasher or do other small tasks as I wander around the house thinking about whatever it is I'm working on.

My spouse works at home, too - his studio and shop are at the other end of the house. Not sure what Gloria and Mark do, but we pretty much ignore each other, meeting occasionally in the kitchen as we both head for the coffee pot.

I use my telecommuting time for those projects that need quiet and thought - usually some big writing project I'm having to deal with. But most of the time, I drag myself into the office because I STILL HAVE TO INTERACT WITH PEOPLE. I still have to 'show up.'

The mayor's giving telecommuting a bad name.

And for someone who keeps saying working with the city council is his number one priority, well, it just doesn't jibe. The quote from Terry Riley in the Star was on point: this will give the council more cohesion. (As I've said before, keep looking for 12-1 votes coming out of the Council Chambers on the 26th floor of City Hall.)



* Though I gigged undecideds in the Presidential election a few paragraphs ago, I must admit to waffling myself on the light rail vote.

Con: it costs TONS of money; only goes a short distance; we have so many other needs.

Pro: it could be the starter line for a larger light rail system (that's been the case in most cities elsewhere in the country); it provides jobs at a time when we need them; and its economic benefits (again, if you look at the experience of other cities) usually returns $6 to $7 in economic development for every $1 spent on the light rail line (the development springs up around the light rail stops...).

This is probably going to be one issue I decide as I'm standing at the voting machine.

Either way, after the election, watch Mike Sanders. I expect the Jackson County Executive to grab the transit leadership mantle from the ineffectual mayor of KCMO (Cows? Give me a break.) And a great community NEEDS good transit. (Notice I didn't say light rail - I said TRANSIT. Buses, BRTs, commuter rail - ie over existing railroad tracks - are all a necessary part of any good transit plan.)

Sunday Morning Rants

* Is the election over yet????? My God, this is going on FOREVER.

* I wrote a few weeks ago that I thought I'd probably like Gloria Squitiro if I met her outside of City Hall. (I tend to like earthy, outspoken women - being one myself.)

After the incident at KCI, I've changed my mind.

Throwing her weight around, being "snotty and sarcastic" (as the skycap testified), threatening the rage of the mayor's office at two people just doing their jobs, are NOT the kinds of behaviors of which I approve.

And does she remember 9/11? Jeez....

* Is this what the start of the Great Depression felt like for my grandparents? Too bad they're no longer here to share that experience. I could use the advice.

* Screw the finger-pointing. BOTH parties are to blame. The subprime mess started in the Clinton administration with an effort to get those who couldn't really qualify into houses of their own. Then Bush loaded up that program even more. A noble idea - but......

Add to that the GOP anathema toward regulation and, well, here we are.

* Back to the Funkhousers: the mayor has managed to make himself completely irrelevant. Notice the recent spate of 12 to 1 votes? The City Council is obviously moving on without him. All he has left is the bully pulpit and, when your colleagues are ignoring you, YOU DON'T MATTER ANYMORE. Even Deb Hermann and Bill Skaggs - one time allies - have gone over to the other side, voting with the rest of the councilmembers.

What I thought was principle turns out to be massive stubborness.

* And is anybody as scared as I am at the way this election has turned? Whack jobs yelling "Kill him" and "Off with his head" at the latest McCain-Palin rallies...as those two candidates try to turn him into 'the other'?


To hell with it all. I'm going for a walk in the woods and relish in the fact that Mother Nature bats last.

In a Funk

We live - just barely - in Kansas City, Missouri (the city's boundary runs through my living room and - yes- that means we pay taxes to two municipalities but only get to vote in one - the one where the house is located: KCMO).

I confess: I voted for Mark Funkhouser.

I thought it was a choice between a really smart man and a really nice one. I've worked in and around City Hall and knew them both. Liked them both. But I figured with all the problems the city faces - crime, huge liabilities taken on during the Barnes administration, the looming gazillion dollar sewer re-do (for the first time, I'm glad we have a septic tank - no sewer fees for us!), the looming light rail plan, the backlog of deferred maintenance, etc. etc. etc. - we needed the smart guy.

Boy, am I disappointed.

You'd think, after 18 years as City Auditor, he'd have figured out how to work City Hall. Ummm.........not so much.

Mayors Cleaver and Barnes knew how to count to seven and they didn't eschew the label 'politician.' When you are elected to political office, you are by definition a politician. And if you want to get anything done at City Hall, you have to get seven votes or it ain't gonna happen. Pissing on/off your colleagues is not a good idea.

The "Drama of the Barefoot Contessa" now playing at 12th & Oak has been wildly entertaining (who could write that kind of stuff???) but, uh, unhelpful. That show needs to close.

I have a feeling that, if I ran into Gloria, I'd probably like her. (I tend to like strong, opinionated, feisty women.)

But enough is enough.


Dear Mark and Gloria,

My, oh, my, what a mess you've made.

I'm sure it's been a rough one-and-a-half years. But hopefully you've learned from past mistakes - like how to do simple background checks on potential Park Board appointees and to not accept free cars.

Since I voted for one of you, I feel entitled to give a little advice prior to Thursday's Council meeting.

Take the high road. (Always a good idea in public and personal relations.) Don't threaten or demean the 12 people you're supposed to be working with. (Remember the number '7.')

In the little time you have left, try to find a compromise. (Difficult to do when you've pissed everybody off, but try anyway...the fine art of compromise is what politicians DO. Half a loaf is better than none.) And if you lose, move on. Swallow the insult and do what we elected you to do.

Gloria, I'm sure you're great, one-on-one, with constituents. You both say that's one of your strengths. So go to all the public meetings you want - outside of City Hall. Represent the mayor all over the place. Personalize your rather austere spouse.

Your role is not that of co-mayor and your place is not the 29th floor. Your intemperate words inside that office have placed the city at risk. Your undefined role has caused confusion and concern among staff and constituents. And a real 'first lady' keeps her shoes on. (Going barefoot in the workplace is just gross. Not to mention highly unprofessional. It's the office of the city's top elected official, for God's sake - show some respect and decorum.)

Usually the people I vote for lose, so it was kinda nice when I picked the winner for a change. Right now I'm regretting that vote.

You've got two-and-a-half years to change my mind. Don't waste it.

Demosthenes